52 Weeks of Blogging with a Purpose: If I could have one superpower...

If I could have one super power it would be the power to heal. It would be amazing to be able to use my hands and words to heal people of their illness but also of their hurts emotionally and not just physically.

Having lost my mother to cancer so young, I often thought about how I wish someone could have touched her and taken away the cancer.  I wish that she would not have had to suffer and go though all that she did.  I know others that have been sick and needed healing and I wish I could have been the one to do it.

So many people walk around with pain that's not physical.  Pain from hurts that they have experienced along their path.  Sometimes it's right on the surface and you can see this pain like its a physical feature. It makes me sad when you see this pain in young kids that shouldn't have to carry it.  I just want to take away all their sadness...not by giving them material things but by being able to heal the pain that they have had to go through.  Tell them they didn't do anything wrong and they didn't deserve it.  I would like to be able to say what they need to hear to let the past go and to heal...and forgive. 

Not sure exactly how my super power would work but I think it would be a miracle to have the power to heal those I love and those that I come across.

What would your superpower be?

52 Weeks of Blogging with a Purpose: If I could be anything in the world...

This topic was another hard one for me...I think this is a running theme with this linkup.  I like that it's pushing me to think about things.  I struggled with this one because I wasn't sure where I wanted to go with it.  This is what came out when I began writing.

When I look inside and ask myself what I would like to be, my first thought is I am already a mom.  I've always wanted to be a mom and I have 2 precious girls, who make me a mommy.  Growing up, I always wanted to be in a mother/daughter relationship.  I would look at my friends and see them with their moms and wanted that relationship.  I knew that while I love my father and we have a good relationship, it's not the same as I would have had with my mom. My mom would have understood a lot of what I was going through and she would have been there for me like no one else could have.  She would have been mine...my mother and many people take that relationship for granted.

For those of you who don't know, my mother Carmen Delia Martinez passed away January 7th, 1987 of breast cancer.  I was 6 and a half years old and I miss her everyday!  It's hard to describe growing up without a mom.  I had a step-mom but she had her own kids and it's not the same.  I had older sisters, who have been like mothers to me throughout my life, however, they had their own lives and their own children to mother.  I feel I turned out fine but it wasn't always easy.  I pray often that I will be there for my girls for all those moments that I missed having my mother there for me...like my wedding and the birth of both my girls.  When they do have their babies someday, I plan to take a month plus vacation and spend the time helping them learn to be a mom themselves.  They might be ready for me to head home after that but I plan to be there for them through it and for as long as they will let me. 

I always knew if/when I had a child I'd have a girl...I picked out her name when I was young and was very thankful none of my sister took my girl name.  Naming my first daughter after my mother was the easiest decision I ever made.  It's funny that she looks SO much like my husband's mother yet she is named after my mom.   She has a bit of both her grandmas in her forever!

Back to the topic, if I could be anything in the world...I would be what I am and I would be a mom to my 2 dearest blessings Carmen and Maria.

What would you be?  Is there something you already are that you always wanted to be?

52 Weeks of Blogging with a Purpose: If I were to win the lottery, 5 Things I'd Buy

This would require actually playing lottery, which my husband and I don't do but it was fun to discuss this week's topic with him as I made my list.  Some of these were on both our lists and one wasn't.  Here are the first 5 things we would buy...

 

1. Pay off our house. Enough said...no monthly mortgage!

2. New cars...I really want a minivan!  Yes, call me soccer mom or whatever you'd like but it would be great to have a minivan with all the extras!  There have been countless times that we've borrowed my sister's minivan because neither our cars fit more than just our family.  Special K really wants a new truck and I would love him to get a new one with a bigger back seat! 

3. Renovate our house.  We have a list of things we plan to do within the next couple years but if we had lottery money then we could do them all right now!

4. A vacation cabin in the mountains.  Not sure exactly where this would be but would love a nice cabin to vacation to.

5. Pay off family mortgages or buy them a house.  We would pay off or purchase a home for each of our parents and our siblings.

Kenny added another one that I wish I would have thought of before I made my list but it would definitely be something that would be on the top of our list if we did have this money. His great idea was to set up trust and college funds for the girls!   When I thought of this list, I thought of right now...figured I wanted immediate satisfaction. 

What would the first 5 things you buy be?

52 Weeks of Blogging with a Purpose: My Biggest Weakness

Dessert...dessert is my biggest weakness.  

JUST KIDDING...If I thought last week's topic was hard...picking just one weakness was harder. Again I wasn't sure where I wanted to go with this post. I am flawed as all humans are.  

I wake up each day with a plan for the day. I go to get started and I get distracted...distracted by what I have no clue! 

This often is paired with tunnel vision. I get so focused on what I am doing that I forget about other things.  I am very capable of multitasking, however, things that I deem important are usually where I put my focus.  Those important things get done 110% but the others go by wayside and sometimes get forgotten.

How this effects my daily life is that I tend to forget to do things. It's not that I intentionally try to forget them.  I always have good intentions, however it's my follow through that really bites the big one!  People who know me know I need lots of reminders to do things.  If I don't do something right away...just keep reminding me because I probably forgot or am focusing on something else at that moment.  I know this can be frustrating for many, especially my husband. He doesn't understand how I didn't see something right there!  I just never focused on it.  I don't do it on purpose, it's just the way I have always been.  I know this about myself though and have worked hard to get better at it.

Thankfully, I have never forgotten my children and am always aware of where they are.  They are my world...so I try to always be in tune with them...it's everything else that often times gets set aside.

This weakness is something I am aware of...without it I would be a better mother, wife, friend, and person.  I would probably manage my home better...think how this distractedness effects cleaning when you have a time crunch...

What has helped me are lists...when I don't forget the list or lose it that is.  Lists save me.  I write lists all the time so that I can stay focused and keep on track with things.  I use my reminder feature and calendar alerts on my phone A TON!  I'm often ask Siri to remind me of things because she never forgets!  I just hope I don't miss the reminder popping up.

I also have prayed that I get better with this.  It's something I'm not proud of and something that has hurt people who are dear to me.  I never intended to hurt them but it has and I am very sorry for that.  It's a weakness that I hope some day I can say I don't have but until then...I just have to keep training my focus to get out of the tunnel and look beyond!

On the bright side of this, once I focus on something it gets done!

What is your biggest weakness?

52 Weeks of Blogging with a Purpose: My Life 5 Years From Now

I'm really not sure why this was such a hard post for me but I spent a lot of time thinking and praying about what to write. Usually I always have a 5 year plan in the back of my head but for some reason I'm having a hard time figuring out what mine is currently. I think I wanted it to be more enlightening but for now I'm just going to write and see what comes out.

My life 5 years from now will look much different but similar to what it is now. What I'm picturing:

We will still be living in our current home that we just closed on in Feb and I hope that it will truly be a home and not just a house. The kitchen and bathroom will have been redone and we'll finally have the landscaping I envision. The playroom will be organized and truly set up as a playroom. Essential I hope that all our major renovation plans are completed and we just have smaller room redos left to do.

In 5 years, my girls will both be getting ready to go to Elementary school. Miss CGR will be 7 1/2 and going into 2nd grade and Miss Ria will be 5 and starting Kindergarten.(I know this is 5 years from now, but I started shaking when I even thought about Carmen going to 2nd grade!) They will hopefully get a long great still and be each other's best friends. Hopefully we'll be on some great summer vacation 5 years from right now and enjoying ourselves before the new school year!

5 years from now, Special K and I will be gearing up to celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary that December and hopefully have FINALLY taken our wedding honeymoon or at least have it planned that year. We still hope to make it to a cabin up north for some time together some day.

I hope to be a better wife and mother, as I know there is always room for improvement.  I want to be the best I can be both for my husband and my children.  I pray often about being what they need and being able to support them in the ways that are best for them.  My relationship with my husband is as important as my relationship with my children.  For them and for us, we need to put effort into making our marriage as strong as possible.  It's never going to be smooth sailing but that's ok...I just hope that we are there for each other for the rest of our days.  I hope that we can set the best example for them on love and security.

Sadly I'm not sure if our pups will still be with us. If they haven't crossed the rainbow bridge, then they will both be very elderly. Jackjack would be 15 and I anticipate having a lot of trouble walking because of his early onset of arthritis. Abigail would be 13 and probably still crazy and silly as ever! If they have crossed, then sadly we probably won't have any dogs in the house. I've agreed to not get any more dogs for a long time since Carmen is allergic to dogs and our schedules are just too crazy the way they are now for a new dog. I still can't imagine our home without dogs...so we'll see if I can keep my promise here.

I'm sure I could go on and on about how I will have all these amazing finished knitting projects and spinning away still! I can't imagine stopping that soon as I feel I am a Knitter/Spinner with capitals...not just someone who knits and spins.

My life 5 years from now will hopefully be full of family time as it is now. I know my nieces and nephews will be off at college or off starting their after college lives but I hope we still see them all often and my sisters are still around to get together with regularly.

I hope that I have found a church home by then. I feel a bit lost without one and I miss having my church community.  I hope to continue my nightly devotionals and to grow in my faith and share this faith with my girls.  I feel it's so important that they grow up with a church home and I need to start taking the steps to make this happen.

Well...hope you enjoyed this post...it's not what I envisioned for it but I think I wanted to make it bigger than it is at this moment.

Happy Blogging! 

Where do you see yourself in 5 years?How often do you think about your 5 year plan?